Leading someone on when you have no intention of being with them is perhaps the worst thing ever. But you may be doing it unconsciously. You have rejected so many people that by now you are perhaps a pro at saying no. Perhaps we all are. We cannot make everyone happy. But how do you say no to someone you really care about without hurting them the slightest bit? We are so protective of our friends we never want them to suffer. And we tell ourselves “bros over hoes”. But what happens when your friend falls for you because they got the wrong hints from you?
How you may lead someone on without you realizing it
When you are spending a lot of time with them
Time’s winged chariot waits for none and time is just as precious to you as it is for everyone else. You are spending time with a friend because you like their company right? But its not so simple. They may interpret it in a different way altogether. This is not to say you have to stop spending time with them. But know your limits. Don’t cancel plans just to be around them.
When you are not an expert at prioritizing
If you have a new friend and you really like being around him/her that’s good news for you! but if you are travelling halfway across the world to be around them you may be giving them the wrong hints. If you are postponing meetings, sneaking out of mundane lectures and coming late to your sibling’s birthday party on a regular basis you may be leading them on unknowingly.
Nothing screams love like presents!
Are you going out of your way to ensure they get everything they have ever wanted? Are you buying them expensive presents and pampering them like no one else? then you may be in trouble. It’s okay to cultivate affection for a friend. What is however not okay is going around endorsing it when you have no intention of dating them.
A drunken mistake is a drunken mistake
We all have that hot friend who makes us drool. But there are certain boundaries you absolutely cannot cross. If you end up in your friend’s bed, you may want to have the “talk” before it’s too late. Friends with benefits is a cool trend and immensely plausible but only when you are certain that the other person has no feelings for you. When you have drunken sex with your friend, you never know how that might end up. We all remember how Parineeti Chopra reacts after Arjun Kapoor had sex with her in “Ishaqzaade” only to break her heart. You wouldn’t want to do that to your friend.
How to give the right hints?
There is no definite way really. You cannot be reckless with your actions. If you feel that your friend has the hots for you, it’s time you confront them directly and clear things out. Leading them on would be worse. You are not “Jai from Jaane Tu ya Jaane Na”, and she isn’t Aditi. You are not going to propose to her at the airport. Things may go downhill with you guys- reality check! And there is nothing worse than losing a friend over something this trivial.
As Alizeh from “Ae Dil Hai Mushkil” would say, “pyaar mein junoon hain…. aur dosti mein sukoon.”
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