We all have high hopes and aspirations regarding our love life and passion. But sometimes, life tends to get in the way. And life can get busy. Welcome to the adult world!
Sometimes this busy life can take a serious toll on your relationship. Humans have a knack for validation. We somehow need to be constantly reminded that we are loved. If your partner forgets to text you one morning you go haywire. And then you overthink and jump to conclusions that may be partially or entirely false. So how do you know if your partner is honestly preoccupied or if he/she is just avoiding you?
Check if there is a pattern
If your partner has been avoiding your calls for some time now and coming up with excuses to not meet up, you should confront him right away. Now, it’s okay to miss a few calls. Everyone is an adult and it’s not possible to stay connected 24 x 7, contrary to what telephone network service providers may endorse. It can be worse if you are getting an engaged tone every now and then especially late at night. Now, if you know the type and schedule of work and it is normal for your bae to be on calls at certain times during the day or night, that should be fine. But if your partner works on morning shifts, it’s not normal for him/her to be on calls every night! So, judge well and discuss openly.
Keep a tab on his social media profiles
Nothing is more repulsive than overly attached girlfriends or boyfriends. Don’t we remember poor Rajat from “Pyar ka Punchnama” who was almost strangled and unable to breathe because of the demands from Neha? Yes! Going out of your way to ensure he/she is loyal is lethal. But if he is active on social media and not texting you back routinely, it’s time for you to ask questions. Talk to him before it is too late but don’t be nagging. Be gentle and open about how you feel.
Priorities!
Even if your partner is genuinely preoccupied, he is still going to keep you on the priority list. Your partner may be late for a few dates, but he/she won’t cancel them repeatedly. They may forget what your hair looked like the previous night but won’t forget your birthday. He/she may forget to call you but will compensate for that, maybe by sending you flowers or a simple charming text. No one, not even the busiest person can fail to prioritize.
Actions speak louder than words
You may have to respect each other’s schedules when your partner tells you that he has a conference. But if he has been consistently bailing out on you, then he obviously disrespects the relationship and is immensely inconsiderate. He may tell you beautiful things but if he is not taking any action to prove them right, you might just have to walk away.
It takes two to tango!
Are you the one to always compromise? Does your spouse even bother to move things around and make time for you? If not, you shouldn’t be with such a person. Any relationship must be fulfilling to say the least, and it should swing both ways.
Look out for these signs. Being preoccupied doesn’t always mean that your bae is unfaithful. Know the facts before you have “the talk”. If he/she is genuinely preoccupied, give them the space to grow and work. I am sure you’d want the same for yourself. You don’t want to be Lara Dutta from “No Entry” who chases her husband away, but you also cannot be Isha Deol who is immensely oblivious to her husband’s debauchery. Its all about the balance, and you have to learn that art for your own good!
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