No matter how assertive or controlling you are in life, when it’s around your social circle, be it your significant other or your friends or family, you feel you are being taken for granted no matter what you do for them and this feeling is definitely not a healthy one. You may do things out of your way to show extra love to your close ones but they soon turn into expectations and you are taken for granted instead.
So it is really important that you fight back this “taken for granted” feeling others give you
Communication is the key
Imagine always going out of your way to please your loved ones and them having absolutely no idea you do so much for them? Yeah, they’d probably feel special and important sometimes but when it starts to happen every day they feel like it’s obvious and they might even get annoyed or disappointed in you if you fail to show the love one particular they because, well, your efforts have been mistaken as something they expect you to do. So communicate, let your partner know what you do for them and make them realize your efforts. Don’t hold these feelings back until you burst at the seams with frustration. Tell your partner how ungrateful they have been when you’ve been so nice and kind to them. Do not make the mistake of holding back and pretending or rather convincing yourself it doesn’t matter to you when it’s really hurting inside.
Your self-respect matters
If you don’t respect and value yourself, you constantly feel you aren’t doing enough for your loved one and you push yourself off limits to make them feel special and when this is not reciprocated back you start feeling that you are taken for granted. Ask yourself if it is necessary to be appreciated by others and whether your self-appreciation is not enough.
Learn to say “no”
If you’re the person who can’t say no when overwhelmed with duty calls, then you better start off now. It is not always necessary to put yourself as sweet and helpful all the time. Sometimes you can say no. By always being there for your loved ones means they’ll start expecting more of you and absolutely take you for granted.
Stop being predictable and overtly sweet
When you’re too predictable, your significant other can totally predict your behavior and manipulate you to do things they want. We can very well relate this to Sridevi’s character in the movie “English Vinglish” where her husband thought, that the purpose of her life was to make “laddoos”. Even if you feel used, you’re helpless and easily give in. You like pleasing the crowd and the truth is you live in the illusion that you’re portraying yourself as a nice and kind person in a ruthless world but actually you are the irrational idealist who lets people take advantage of you and take you for granted.
Learn to take decisions and confront people
Postponing important decisions and being spineless about your problems is an immature way of dealing with it. Learn to confront the person who makes you feel taken for granted instead of holding it back and lying to console and calm your heart. Remember, you don’t always have to seek others’ approval. Remember, you can be stern in front of the bossy and assertive people if you feel something is wrong. We all know how Kangana’s decision to go on her pre-booked honeymoon trip to Paris and Amsterdam in the movie “Queen” changed her life forever.
Fighting for yourself is never a wrong decision. Remember that you are as important as you make others feel and if your efforts are not being appreciated you have every right to voice it out and confront your partner. This way, you won’t feel that you’re being taken for granted all the time and feel helpless and used always.
Read Also: How To Keep Your Relationship Healthy?
