You may be bisexual, gay or lesbian, or have any kind of sexual preference. It is possible that you’re in this sort of a relationship, or feel like this for someone and are thinking of talking about this with your parents.
If you are going through any of this, before reading ahead, wait, and take a deep breath. It is natural for you to feel worried, and imagine 10,000 scenarios of what can potentially go wrong when you tell your parents about it.
But unless you tell them, you’ll never really know their reaction. They could oppose it, or they may agree with you! Whichever direction the discussion takes, one thing is for sure – you really need to be prepared before you have that talk.
So keep the following in mind before you come out to your parents.
Choose The Timing With Care
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While what you say and the way you say it is crucial, the time you choose to talk about your sexual preference is of extreme importance too. If you have guests at home, or if you know that your parents are worried about something, or are preparing for something big, delay the talk. What you’re about to say may not be the best news, and they can react negatively if they are stressed, even if they wouldn’t have been be so bothered about it otherwise.
Don’t Do It When You’re In A Breakup
If you’re in the middle of a breakup, postpone talking to your parents. The reason is – if your parents see you heartbroken and sad, they will use this as a reason to make you think of changing your sexual preferences.
Be Ready For The Questions
Don’t expect your parents to jump and hug you and say they understand you. While this could be the case, it will mostly be an exception. To make sure that you have answers to all their queries, be ready. When did you realize this? Have you tried having a ‘normal’ relationship? Are you sure this is not a phase? Do you really want to go through the social issues and reactions?
Don’t Lose Your Cool
To be realistic, it’s natural for parents to get upset or angry when they hear this for the first time. You may not like a lot of what they say, but no matter what, unless they’re physically hurting you, do not lose your cool. Stay calm and hear them out, let them vent. Once they let go of the anger, they may be in a better space to understand you.
Know When To End The Talk
Be ready to end the talk if you feel things are getting really heated up, or if you feel threatened in any way. Say something such as “okay, let’s talk about it later” or “I don’t think this is a good time for anyone” or something, and move away.
The idea is to let your parents know that this is what you want, and whether or not they approve, this is your choice. How you tell them and how you react is something you have some control on. So do it wisely. And if you feel the discussion is getting out of hand, and if you feel scared, stop it for the time being, and talk about it later, at a time when you feel your parents are in a little calmer state of mind.
