Sometimes our lovers manipulate us for the sake of getting things done. Sometimes it’s just for fun in a really trivial and obvious manner and sometimes it gets serious to get some benefits from the other partner which could even be sex.
How to recognize a manipulative lover?
You need to notice how your partner reacts when you decline something and you are serious about it and if he is respectable about it. Notice if they bring up the request once again or even threaten to abuse you if you don’t give in. Do they withhold sex or give you a silent treatment until you surrender. No matter how clear you make yourself and give enough explanation they would still force it on you.
We have a perfect example of manipulation and sex in the Bollywood movie “Jism”, where Sonia (Bipasha Basu), manipulates Kabir through sex, in order to fulfill her purpose and inherit riches.
Signs that your lover manipulates you:
Anxiety:
You feel worried when your partner asks you for a favor and you assume it will be something you can’t do and you can’t deny his request.
Hating Yourself:
You hate yourself for being so weak in front of your partner and you know he is taking advantage of your niceness and generosity but you can do nothing about it.
You can’t say no:
You can’t say no to them because the very thought of denying seems like a crazy idea to you. You know that the right thing to do is to say “no” but you can’t bring yourself to say that.
You justify your action:
You are the one justifying yourself that you aren’t being used and you are the one wanting favors from him instead.
You feel bad about yourself:
You feel that you’re a bad person turning your partner down all the time.
Expectations grow:
Your partners continuously expect from you. Even if you do a lot and put in a lot of effort they behave like they are really contented and happy but they always ask for more of you.
You can’t shut up:
You always find a constant reason to explain yourself and your action. You always want your partner to understand you clearly. Your partner, on the other hand, is always indefinite about his actions.
You hate awkward pauses:
When your partner asks for a favor and pauses for some time to stare at you, you muster up courage to say “no” but you always give in.
You feel very obligated:
You feel that you’re obligated and you constantly have to do things for your partner to please him. You constantly have to feel grateful for having him in your life.
You can’t lie:
You can’t lie to your partner even though you feel the need to. You can’t tell them that you are preoccupied or too busy to do anything for them.
Feeling selfish:
You feel like you’re being really selfish and you feel guilty for always turning his request down. It seems easier to hate yourself instead.
Talking about manipulating partners, the Bollywood movie “Fashion” is a classic example of how partners manipulate to have sexual intercourse and specifically to get things done.
In a nutshell, there may be quite a number of times your partner is manipulating be it for sex or anything for that matter, to get things done that you might be missing out on. However, before it’s too late you should act upon these unhealthy and rather toxic signs.
Read Also: 5 Foods For Better Sexual Health
